A Bus Story

It's been awhile since I've had a good bus driving story. After the first few times Jay subbed it got to be the same….bus traveling all over the school district with stinky little kids who didn't know the route and the driver at the mercy of these kids just praying they will let him know where their house is before he goes past it. Pretty much the same story every time. But then yesterday happened. Sorry – I'm afraid this will be a long post. So much to tell. I laughed so hard last night my mascara ran all over the place.

Jay subbed yesterday afternoon. Tom, the bus guy, said that the regular drivers granddaughter would know the route. When Jay asked her she looked at him like he was crazy and said she didn't know what it was. That meant Jay was on his own on the town route, which is one of the hardest ones. You also have to remember that he has an ear infection so his ears are full of fluid…add that on top of 12 years in a shop class (I think it's starting to damage his hearing), a noisy/windy bus, and kids who are whispering. Jay couldn't hear anything…except when he would drive by a kids house and then they'd say "there went my house". It's a good thing it is a small town because I think he spent a lot of his day backing up the bus in the middle of the road.

At one point Jay said he had to back up at a 90 degree angle and it was tough. There was a mailbox that was close but he had it in his mirror the whole time. Then there was a HS boy who kept yelling "hey"…"hey". It startled Jay every time so once they got out in the country Jay did the old bus driver trick where he stopped the bus and yelled "hey, you get up here right now". He sat the boy in the front and told him to quit acting like an idiot. There was also a HS girl on the bus who is in trouble constantly. She was very loud and obnoxious. Finally Jay got the route done and headed back to the bus barn….

When he got there Tom asked him how the route went. A mother had already called Tom and complained about the driver of her son's route. Jay got tattled on by a kindergartner. The boy told his mom Jay called someone an idiot, hit a trashcan (which didn't happen), and almost hit a mailbox (which Jay knew was there the whole time). Either Tom is desperate for sub drivers or he wasn't concerned because he asked Jay to sub 3 more times this week. Jay said it's the hardest $20 he's ever made.

Last night we had a 4-H meeting so we stopped by Jim and Sharon's before hand. Jay and Cade were talking about the bus route that afternoon. Cade told a story about the crazy HS girl and Jay said "she's a real peach". Jay uses the term "peach" when he's talking about someone who is hard to deal with. Sharon said "Jay!", because she was afraid Cade would go to school and repeat what Jay said. Cade said "oh, don't worry about it, I've heard that word before." I sat there for a minute and I wondered what Cade thought Jay said so I said "Cade he said Peach, not a bad word". Cade said "oh, I thought he said the bad one." Sharon said "Cade, your dad wouldn't use that kind of language." Cade said "well, this morning when that bus came out of nowhere and we had to go in the ditch I heard him whisper a bad word." That was definitely a story Jay hadn't shared with me yet… Jay said "it was that Mount Vernon bus that goes by our house, I need to call the school and tattle on him."

I have to admit that I understood what Jay meant with the MV bus. I've tangled with that thing before to. Once you do it, you know to watch for it. To look right out of our driveway you look directly into the sun. Then our driveway is mid-point of a small hill and then there are a lot of trees shadowing the road. It is one of those deals where when the sun is just right it's really hard to see for a couple of seconds. Then this bus flies down our road going about 55 in the center of the road and Jay wasn't even sure that the headlights were on yesterday morning. Jay started to turn right out of the driveway and he was pulling a trailer, which meant he had to swing out wide. The demon bus popped over the hill out of nowhere so Jay had to the cut the steering wheel hard and go through the ditch to get out of its way. I remember hearing a noise as I was getting in my car yesterday morning. I looked up and saw Jay pulling out and assumed it was that. Now I know it was actually the sound of the truck and trailer dragging through the ditch.

Then later in the night Cade told us about hearing another dad use a couple of not very nice words. We used that as a teaching opportunity to say that the difference between that dad and Jay is that the only timed Jay used a bad word was in the time of huge stressful event…when he was almost ran over by a 40 passenger school bus in his own front yard. We were also able to work in that you don't need to share everything that pops in your head either like when he told his Memo his dad said a bad word. I'm sure Cade will think that over until the next event happens and then he'll once again share everything he knows.

And to think I almost didn't go to the 4-H meeting with them last night. I would've missed all of this fun.