A Great Day

Saturday was the one year anniversary of our Match Day.  We didn't actually celebrate it, we just had a good day.  I went to Sheldon Friday night.  I had to get the lamb cake pan from Aunt Helen for Camryn's party.  I'll post more about that later.  I'm not sure how old it is but at least a 60ish???? year old cake pan that is a Fowler grandkid tradition.  Every one has a lambie cake at their 1st Birthday.  You can't eat it, you just have it for pictures.  I'm sure I'll be up all Saturday night making it.  So anyway, I had to get it and I wanted to see Leslie and Josie and see my dad.  All three tasks were accomplished.  Cade was supposed to go with us, but the social life of a 10 year old is pretty active.  He got invited to a birthday party Saturday afternoon and then had baseball pictures Saturday morning.  He stayed with Jay so Camryn and I had a girls weekend. 
Saturday morning I realized that Camryn hasn't played with any of her dolls for awhile.  I found an old one of Charity's....she was less than impressed with it.  Actually I think it scared her a little.  Then we went to buy new shoes and eat Mexican with Papa Kerry.  Camryn actually ate quite a bit.



After lunch we visited with Leslie and Josie.  Two girls 6 weeks apart aren't easy to photograph.  They really could've cared less about each other, but Leslie and I had a good time catching up.  One of these days they will love to play together.  They are still too young to do that now. 





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After we left Josie we played at Papa Kerry's for awhile.  Camryn got her first ride on a tractor.....





Chased one of his cat's.....




Finally with Papa's help she got to pet it.  This girl loves animals.  She doesn't pay any attention to the TV unless it is a pet commercial.  She will stop everything and watch the animals.  I have a fear she will be the type to bring strays home.....




This is her classic "bull" pose.  She could spot Papa's cows in the field.  She will point in the direction and say bull over and over until you take her to see the cows.  I think that is so funny.  With kids you don't know how much is genetic and how much is environment - but she certainly loves cows.  I know a lot can change, but if she is still as thrilled with cattle in 8 years as she is now she might like to show more than Cade.  It will definitely be interesting to watch what happens over the years. 



After we left Sheldon we headed to Joplin to get birthday party supplies.   The big party is next Sunday.  Camryn made her presence known in every store we went to because she waved and blew kisses to everyone.  Those were her two new tricks last week.  It was pretty sweet.  I think the blowing kisses thing though is a cover-up for the fact she's been extremely "busy" the last 24 hours.  How can we be upset for dragging her out of the cabinet 786 times if she follows it up by blowing us a kiss?  She knows how to work it! 

It is still hard to believe that we are planning her 1st Birthday party.  Last year Memorial Day weekend was kind of rough.  We hadn't heard from her birthmom is a week.  The last thing we knew was she was having contractions.  We thought that C had probably had the baby and wouldn't contact the agency.  We filled the 3 day weekend by keeping ourselves busy.  A year later we will still be very busy, but for a totally different reason. 

The boy's weekend was a little different than ours.  Between chauffeuring Cade around to pictures and a birthday party plus a graduation party Jay was a little short on time.  I meant to take a picture of our yard but forgot.  Jay has to turn a pile of lumber that is in our backyard into this by 4:00 pm next Sunday.  He had hoped to a get a bit more done than he did, but due to Cade's social demands that didn't happen.  Today he's trying to get the Icebox up and running.  And summer is supposed to be when it slows down????

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Concession Stand Sociology

Yesterday was Cade’s first ball game. I don’t have much to report on that end because I had to work the concession stand. The concession stand is prime people watching space. Before the game even started I texted Jay that I’d already had two customers worthy of blog notation.


In all my years of concession stand experience there is one constant to every stand I’ve ever worked-there is that one kid with the sweaty $$$ that will be in the window the second it cracks open for the first time. He/She will more than likely be your best customer the rest of the evening. Jay always pegs the kid like that at the Icebox and declares that will be the kid we make the most money from. Last nights concession stand did not disappoint-that kid was there in a flash. It’s like a cat stalking it’s pray. At the first sound of the latches being loosened they are up and ready to pounce….the second the door cracks open bam! They are in your face.

I didn’t know I was working the concession stand until I got the game. So in other words – I was inexperienced and didn’t know what was going on. Our team needed two mothers to do it and since Cade is the youngest player I was the first one drafted. It was fine because Jim and Sharon were there so they watched Camryn. It’s also the first week of ballgames so things aren’t sorted out yet i.e slighty disorganized. The doors on the stand were open but we didn’t have any change. “The Kid” came up to the window with a sweaty $5 in his hands. I’m experienced….I knew what the kid had, I knew he wasn’t going to spend it all at once and I knew I couldn’t make change for him. I told him he’d have to come back in a few minutes. Our coach must’ve thought I wasn’t very nice because he said “Hey bud, what do you want”? The kid wanted two gatorades which came to $3. Tom nicely explained to him that he’d need to bring back $3 exact or wait. The kid just stood there. Tom went on about his business while I was stuck there somewhat awkwardly with this kid and his puppy dog eyes. He was at the right height where his chin was almost able to rest on the counter. A few tortured minutes passed and the kid looked at me and said “what about that red and blue Gatorade”? I patiently explained to him for the 3rd time in less than 5 minutes we didn’t have any change. The kid said “Oh”. He waited a few more minutes then said “I guess I’ll come back later”. The other mother working with me didn’t seem to be the type to laugh at this sort of thing so I kept it to myself. I couldn’t wait to run it by Jay later.

The other customer was a mother from the opposing team. She was high maintenance. I’m sure every town is about the same as Miller….youth sports is ran by volunteers, it’s a thankless job….people are drafted minutes before game time to work in these stands. The concession stand it not designed to be a 5 star restaurant. It’s something to fill in the time while you wait for the long hour and a half game to pass. This mother wasn’t happy that the popcorn was microwave so she opted for Nachos, even though she pointed out to me that Nachos were in fact not listed on the sign out front. A little later she came back and inquired about our drinks….again we aren’t a 7-11….bottled water, 3 different Gatorade colors and some pop cans. She wasn’t sure what she wanted. Then she asked the temperature of the pop. She was afraid it might be too cold. We grabbed a can for her to feel. It seemed to be ok but of course she didn’t want the can we had pulled out already, she wanted a different kind. She finally settled on the type and determined the temperature was ok and she left. But she came back. This time she wanted candy. I went through the list of the candy in the fridge. Again, we don’t have a large selection….Starbursts, plain M&M’s and Hersheys with Almonds. When I mentioned Starbursts she got a look on her face and in a very serious hushed tone she said “have they told you about the Starbursts”. I am not exaggerating about this at all – her tone was the same as someone leaning in and saying “Has anyone told you your dress is caught up in your underwear and you are wearing a thong”. She was dead serious about whatever she needed to tell me about the Starbursts. They expired in 2009. Good Grief – what am I supposed to do about it. I just said “oh sorry”. She asked for the M&M’s. Before she walked away from the window she rotated the package 3 or 4 times looking for the expiration date. I wanted to say “it’s chocolate not dairy”!

These baseball encounters seriously make my summers. I only wish Jay could’ve been there with me. He would’ve laughed. I don’t think the mother I was working with was a finely tuned to Concession Stand Sociology as he and I are.

The Most Important Email. Ever.

One year ago today we got an email right about 4:00 pm.  When printed out that email amounts to about ¾ of a page.  When you read the actual description on the situation that could fit on ½ a page.  One year ago today this……..

Was a few lines on half a sheet of paper. During our wait we lived for those situations emails. I wish I had kept track of how many of those things we read over the years. I started to keep them all but they got pretty depressing so I stopped. My best guess would be 60 ish at least. Each one would bring hope and excitement. I’d mentally calculate leave dates and such. No matter how much I’d tell myself to not get my hopes up too much it was impossible to do. It was just the way it was.


This email was different though. I’m not sure why or how, but I knew from the moment I read that email this baby was ours. We didn’t find out we were chosen until May 19th, but I just had a feeling. There were times during the next couple of weeks I wondered if we would actually bring that baby home but for the most part I had an incredible sense of peace. I just knew. I don’t know how God works everything out. I don’t know that His plan was for C to experience the pain of placing her child for adoption so our family would be complete. I think it’s more His way of making the best of a not the best situation???? I don’t know….I don’t even pretend to know that I have the answers to those tough questions. I think it’s a combination of becoming older and wiser and struggling with infertility/adoption for so many years, but every day I understand Proverbs 3:5 a little more…. Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. The older I get the more I realize there is less and less I understand about this world, but that is the way it is supposed to be. That’s how I continue to approach Camryn’s adoption….there are many many things I don’t understand and I just know that God will provide the answers when I need them. I’m not naive though and think there will never be issues that stem from her adoption, I’m just completely putting it with God and we’ll go from there. All I know right now is that one year ago today our lives changed forever.  This little girl was ours from the moment I opened the email and read those few lines.






On April 21, 2011 I blogged this....

This time of year I tend to get myself a little extra worked up because we are heading into summer….How great would it be to get a baby during the summer and I could take my 12 weeks off and spend it at home with a new baby, Cade & Jay. So the Easter daydreams are being replaced with summer vacation dreams….which this is nothing new. Happens every year around this time….

How God like is it that a few short days later our prayers were answered?  Little did we know that when we sent our yes email back to the agency at 4:14 pm we were saying yes to this…..

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5th Grade

In a few short hours I will be the mother of a 5th grader.  I can't hadly believe it.  When you hold your new baby and people tell you how fast it goes it's hard to believe it.  At that moment you are so wrapped up in bottles and diapers and not sleeping you think it is moving pretty dang slow!  Then you blink and they are almost as tall as you and you can wear their jackets.  I don't feel the sadness though that I've felt the other years when school was over.  I cried a lot on those days.  I felt like Cade's childhood was slipping by too fast.  It is a relief today to actually feel ok about today.  Like Cade said when he was brushing his teeth....don't worry mom, you still have Camryn and you'll be 50 when she is a Sophomore.  My firstborn knows how to make my day. 

Yesterday was his school field trip.  I didn't go this year, Jay got the honors.  They were going through a cave and fishing.  Very daddy like activities.  Jay wasn't sure if he was riding the bus or driving so he took my car to school.  Our garage door has been broken since about Christmas. Like most other families in our stage of life money and time are in short supply so we've been living with it.  Opening and closing it ourselves isn't a big deal.  As Jay was getting in the car yesterday he told Cade to close the door.  Cade did close the door.....before Jay backed the car out.  It's a good thing Jay realized it or we might have been forced in to buying a new garage door.  I'm probably not too sad today because I know Cade is still going to need us for a very long time  :)

As you can probably tell by this picture.....

The lawnmower saga continues.  We are/were/hopefully still borrowing Granddad's old mower from Jim and Sharon.  Yesterday after round 1 the mower didn't want to turn.  Jay had to jump off before it hit the ditch and blew the tire off of the rim.  Unfortunately I had my back to the incident and missed the whole thing.  I about fell over from laughing though when Jay told me what happened. 

I was having issues of my own - using our cattle blow dryer to blow the leaves out of our front flower bed.  Note to self - avoid all houses that the description starts with wooded lot with park like setting.....that is code for you will learn to hate trees.  Jay prefers to use the cattle dryer instead of the leaf blower because sometimes he doesn't like dealing with gas engines.  By the looks of the picture on the left you can understand why.  While Jay was putting on a show for the neighbors I was burning my hands off with the dryer hose.  All I could think of was that the stupid dryer had better not blow up because WE ARE NOT GETTING A NEW ONE THIS SUMMER.  I finally called it quits because I was afraid it was going to overheat. 

We were somewhat resigned to getting a new mower until last Friday.  We got the bill for Jay's truck repairs.  Lets just say we've paid a years worth of payments on the truck in the last 2 weeks.  We aren't getting a new mower any time soon.  It is going to be a long summer.  Once plus though of the wooded lot is that all of those trees suck so much moisture from the ground that the grass should die quickly.  Jay managed to borrow our neighbors mower last night.  Camryn's party is two weeks from yesterday....hopefully we can scrounge a mower up by then.  Or we may have a new party game entitled How Much Grass Can You Cut With a Pair of Scissors .  I was about to give in to the goat idea but Jay told me they wouldn't eat the dead leaves.

Cade, Camryn & Ducks

I don't think I've told a Cade story in awhile.  Most of his stuff happens so fast that I can't remember it later.  It really irritates me because I could probably write a book on everything that flows out of his mouth.  Friday night was Jay's FFA Banquet.  I barely had the car in park before Cade was begging to go inside.  Apparently I'm too slow now that I have to get Camryn and the diaper bag out of the car.  I told him to go ahead and I didn't see him until it was time to leave.  I'm not even sure he ate.  I take that back, I did see him once because the student teachers called him up front during the banquet and gave him a gift....a new Razorback T-shirt.  Cade put the new shirt on over his dress shirt.    After the banquet one of the dad's, I'll call him G,  came up and asked if I knew where my son was at.  I told him I didn't have a clue.  G said he'd looked all over for him and couldn't find him so he asked  me to give Cade this message and to make sure I told him it was from G....tell him that cowboys are worth something all the time but a hog is only worth something when it is dead. Seeing that G was wearing a OSU hat I figured that had something to do with it. G told me that when he walked in the door Cade went up to him and told him he needed to dispose of his hat. 

We've all had a good laugh over the story, but Cade hasn't laughed yet.  He gets quite defensive about it.  There is no joking when it comes to Arkansas.  Another dad, who I guess actually played for Tennessee said something to him about being a Hog fan after the banquet.  I wasn't close enough to hear, but I was close enough to see.  I saw a look of absolute disgust come over Cade's face and I started sweating.  I was so scared of what Cade was saying and where the conversation might lead.  Thankfully it didn't come down to a fight, but don't think that Cade wouldn't have fought him.  Cade teases Camryn frequently and Jay can't stand it.  I've told him that a little teasing never hurt anyone (as long as it's not mean spirited). It's good so people won't take themselves quite as seriously.....I think Cade might need a little more of it. On the way home that night I asked Cade about what he was taking to the Tennessee guy about.  Cade said he just has to mouth other college teams.  Probably time for him to learn to take what he dishes out.      


In Camryn news.....I can't say that she is 100% walking but she is very very close.  Last night, at home, she took 5 steps in a row.  When we went to Cade's baseball practice last night she walked all over the concrete slab.  I predict that by the end of baseball season I will be exhausted because she will be running!  Jay conveniently texted the coach last night to say he would help in the dug out during the games....
Watching her walk though was somewhat surreal.  A year ago we didn't even know about Camryn, now here she is walking.  Can't time slow down just a tiny bit????




When I picked Camryn up yesterday afternoon we took a walk around the local pond.  She had her first duck sighting and loved it.  The first time was ok, the 2nd time around she cried when we moved away from them.  I finally had to take her out of the stroller and carry her.  I got a little more of a workout than I had anticipated.  This girl loves animals. 

Ahoy Matey!

The Baptist church had a pie auction last night and they asked Jay to be the auctioneer. Camryn got a little tired if being held so Cade took her to the nursery. I think this was what she did all night. It is probably a good thing there weren't any other kids her age to fight her for it. That might
Have been bad.



This one says "just try to take me off this thing"










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Back in Time

This was my 1 year old Easter Dress. I was sorting though some clothes and decided to put it on Camryn. Things have changed a lot in 34 years. Not sure the tie around the neck is very safe! The bonnet also lost some of it's punch over the years. Camryn wasn't too thrilled when I turned her into my life sized baby doll.

When I spoke too soon....

I had mentioned a few posts ago about Jay’s bacterial infection in his eyes. What is funny about that infection is that the day he came down with it I was talking to my sister about eye infections. I told her that out of everything we’ve ever had, and believe me we’ve had a lot of strange things, we’ve never had eye problems in our house. After I got off the phone with Charity Jay called me from the school and said he had some goop in his eyes. Then later in the evening he said it felt like something was stuck in his eyes. Here is a little tidbit on me. If you tell me something and I don’t seem to respond appropriately to what you told me please don’t be concerned. Usually I have to let things sink in awhile. My mind will catch up to what you told me in a day or two. Sometimes I wonder if I’m going through early menopause or something. Anyway, none of what Jay told me really registered until we tucked Cade in to bed that night. I looked at Jay across Cade’s bed…YIKES!! His eyes were fire red. I suggested he get himself to a doctor quickly the next day, which he agreed to do. He went to his eye doctor and he said Jay wasn’t too contagious. I thought that was crazy talk. Anything I’ve ever heard about eye infections is that they are very contagious. I decided not to worry about it though because Jay was leaving for State Convention. He’d only be infecting the entire state of Missouri, but not us!


This past Sunday evening Camryn was extremely cranky. She’s been a little on edge anyway the last two weeks because she’s cutting a molar, but that was worse than normal. I had a feeling she was getting sick. Monday morning she woke up with her eyes matted shut. Poor baby! I took her to the doctor that afternoon and she also had an eye infection. I asked the doctor if this was contagious and he said that it was very contagious. See, Jay’s eye doctor was crazy!!! I’m not sure though that Camryn’s came from Jay because there were 2 weeks between them, but who knows. I asked the doctor if I started getting it could I call him. He just went ahead and wrote me a prescription just in case (as Camryn was rubbing her face all over mine).

Camryn’s been on the drops for 24 hours and her eyes looks much better and her mood has been wonderful. I noticed Monday the molar had popped through so life has been considerably better the last two nights. My eyes though are now burning and watering. I don’t have a mirror in my office and I’m almost scared to leave for fear I look like Alice Cooper. Hopefully it’s just dry eyes…..