Tuesday, May 31, 2011


Last night Avery had a T-Ball game so Cade and I went to Nevada to see her play.  There was a scheduling snafu...the schedules were printed with games starting on the hour, last nights was 6, but the coach failed to notify the parents the games would start 1/2 hour before the printed time on the schedule.  As past little league coaches Jay and I were quite baffled by that scenerio.  And since I can't stand disorder it drove me nuts.  I still can't understand why you would print a schedule but not have the games start at that time.  But like Jay said - welcome to Vernon County!  Yes, they don't have it as together has Lawrence County (ha ha!!!)  So anyway, half of Avery's team was late (including Avery) and so were Cade and I.  We got to see her bat 1 time and then the game was over.  Then Charity, Avery, Lawson, Mom, Cade and I went to eat Mexican.  That was when the excitement started.....

I tried to snap a few pictures to record the absolute chaos that ensued at the restaurant, but it just doesn't do it justice.  I'm sure everyone knew we were in the place.  It started with Lawson.  He was put in a highchair at the end of the booth and he would immediately stand up and crawl on the table towards the chip basket.  Mom was shoved in a far corner with the chips and the salsa trying to keep them out of his grubby reach.  I bet he crawled on the table 5 or 6 times.  Charity finally moved him to the booth between her and me.  Avery and Cade sat with Mom on the other side.  Cade was in the middle and he said Avery kept rubbing chips in his hair.  He didn't like that.  So mom switched him places but Avery didn't like that - she wanted to sit by Cade.  So they switched again.  While that was going on Lawson was grabbing everything in sight...chips, salsa, napkins, drinks etc.   Then Lawson's food came - cheese quesadilla and beans.  Charity told me she was sorry for getting him beans.  At some point during the evening both of us were touched by grubby bean covered hands.  One time I caught him before he touched me and then he looked right at me, grinned and reached for me again.  He knew what he was doing!  Charity left with beans in her hair and all over her black tank top.  Towards the end of the meal Lawson grabbed a spoon and started eating the cheese sauce.  We were all too exhausted to stop him.

Then Avery had to go to the bathroom.  I guess she always has to go when they eat at this place.  Mom took her.  Then Cade decided he needed to go so he went to the bathroom.  Mom's who only have 1 boy will understand my fear here....When they reach this age they are too old to use the women's bathroom.  It embarrasses them, which is understandable.  So you let them go the men's by themselves but you get nervous if it takes them longer than a minute.  If you had two boys it would be better - safety in numbers, but one boy is hard.  I don't think anyone can really appreciate it until they've experienced it.  Or when you have to go you position them outside the door with instructions to scream if someone tries to take them and you use the bathroom in record time all while wondering if they really would scream if someone tried to take them.  I had one of those moments last night when Cade used the bathroom for the 2nd time while we were at the restaurant.  It was odd for him to go twice in that short amount of time.  Then it seemed like it was taking him a little longer than normal.  Charity is still in baby mode so she didn't see anything odd about Cade's disappearance.  I told her to just wait until Lawson was this age.  She will be in the same predicament, unless she has another baby soon and it is a boy (after last night I wouldn't recommend that to her though)  Someday she will be hoovering outside the men's bathroom door trying to peak in anytime it gets opened. Anyway Cade finally came back before I had to march into the men's bathroom to see what was going on.  He said "Well, I did have to go to the bathroom but mostly I just stood in there for the quiet for awhile."  Yes, it was a crazy night....and a reminder of why God has placed our children 9+ years apart....

Can you see all of his curls...it was especially curly last night.  It fit is personality perfectly last night.  Even mom said she had never seen him quite so wild before.

Avery was so excited to see Cade.  I need to get a picture of the two of them standing together.  I was quite amazed by the height difference.  But Avery picked Cade up off the ground.  I'd say he is at least twice her weight.  She is strong. 

Here is the cheese sauce covered boy.  You can see it dripping down his shirt.
Last night was one of those priceless evenings! 

Monday, May 23, 2011


The images from Joplin are just unbelievable.  I saw a picture of Academy Sports - it is unrecognizable.  Mom and I were in there about 24 hours earlier getting Cade new baseball pants and cleats.  I just can't get over the devestation.  I saw pictures from a camera that looked like it was going down Rangeline.  You can't even tell where they are because there are no buildings.  We've just had another minor storm blow through so I imagine that Joplin is now getting the same rain we are.  That would have to hamper their search and recovery efforts.  I haven't been outside since I got to work but Jay said it's cooled off - so that also isn't doing them any favors.  What a tragedy. 

Something else that really blows my mind are people who see those kinds of images and still won't take shelter if they are in a tornado warning.  Crazy. 

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

A Bus Story

It's been awhile since I've had a good bus driving story. After the first few times Jay subbed it got to be the same….bus traveling all over the school district with stinky little kids who didn't know the route and the driver at the mercy of these kids just praying they will let him know where their house is before he goes past it. Pretty much the same story every time. But then yesterday happened. Sorry – I'm afraid this will be a long post. So much to tell. I laughed so hard last night my mascara ran all over the place.

Jay subbed yesterday afternoon. Tom, the bus guy, said that the regular drivers granddaughter would know the route. When Jay asked her she looked at him like he was crazy and said she didn't know what it was. That meant Jay was on his own on the town route, which is one of the hardest ones. You also have to remember that he has an ear infection so his ears are full of fluid…add that on top of 12 years in a shop class (I think it's starting to damage his hearing), a noisy/windy bus, and kids who are whispering. Jay couldn't hear anything…except when he would drive by a kids house and then they'd say "there went my house". It's a good thing it is a small town because I think he spent a lot of his day backing up the bus in the middle of the road.

At one point Jay said he had to back up at a 90 degree angle and it was tough. There was a mailbox that was close but he had it in his mirror the whole time. Then there was a HS boy who kept yelling "hey"…"hey". It startled Jay every time so once they got out in the country Jay did the old bus driver trick where he stopped the bus and yelled "hey, you get up here right now". He sat the boy in the front and told him to quit acting like an idiot. There was also a HS girl on the bus who is in trouble constantly. She was very loud and obnoxious. Finally Jay got the route done and headed back to the bus barn….

When he got there Tom asked him how the route went. A mother had already called Tom and complained about the driver of her son's route. Jay got tattled on by a kindergartner. The boy told his mom Jay called someone an idiot, hit a trashcan (which didn't happen), and almost hit a mailbox (which Jay knew was there the whole time). Either Tom is desperate for sub drivers or he wasn't concerned because he asked Jay to sub 3 more times this week. Jay said it's the hardest $20 he's ever made.

Last night we had a 4-H meeting so we stopped by Jim and Sharon's before hand. Jay and Cade were talking about the bus route that afternoon. Cade told a story about the crazy HS girl and Jay said "she's a real peach". Jay uses the term "peach" when he's talking about someone who is hard to deal with. Sharon said "Jay!", because she was afraid Cade would go to school and repeat what Jay said. Cade said "oh, don't worry about it, I've heard that word before." I sat there for a minute and I wondered what Cade thought Jay said so I said "Cade he said Peach, not a bad word". Cade said "oh, I thought he said the bad one." Sharon said "Cade, your dad wouldn't use that kind of language." Cade said "well, this morning when that bus came out of nowhere and we had to go in the ditch I heard him whisper a bad word." That was definitely a story Jay hadn't shared with me yet… Jay said "it was that Mount Vernon bus that goes by our house, I need to call the school and tattle on him."

I have to admit that I understood what Jay meant with the MV bus. I've tangled with that thing before to. Once you do it, you know to watch for it. To look right out of our driveway you look directly into the sun. Then our driveway is mid-point of a small hill and then there are a lot of trees shadowing the road. It is one of those deals where when the sun is just right it's really hard to see for a couple of seconds. Then this bus flies down our road going about 55 in the center of the road and Jay wasn't even sure that the headlights were on yesterday morning. Jay started to turn right out of the driveway and he was pulling a trailer, which meant he had to swing out wide. The demon bus popped over the hill out of nowhere so Jay had to the cut the steering wheel hard and go through the ditch to get out of its way. I remember hearing a noise as I was getting in my car yesterday morning. I looked up and saw Jay pulling out and assumed it was that. Now I know it was actually the sound of the truck and trailer dragging through the ditch.

Then later in the night Cade told us about hearing another dad use a couple of not very nice words. We used that as a teaching opportunity to say that the difference between that dad and Jay is that the only timed Jay used a bad word was in the time of huge stressful event…when he was almost ran over by a 40 passenger school bus in his own front yard. We were also able to work in that you don't need to share everything that pops in your head either like when he told his Memo his dad said a bad word. I'm sure Cade will think that over until the next event happens and then he'll once again share everything he knows.

And to think I almost didn't go to the 4-H meeting with them last night. I would've missed all of this fun.

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Seasonal Allergies

Jay and I are quite a pair right now. His allergies this spring have been horrible – the worst I've ever seen him deal with. He's had some sort of snotting/snorting problem since the first part of March. It finally caught up with him last weekend…his ear started to hurt. Monday morning he went to the doctor and found out he had (and I'm quoting the doctor here ) a raging ear infection. $75 later he is hopefully on the road to recovery. Jay can now sympathize with poor Lawson…pressure in his ear, can't sleep through the night, and just plain doesn't feel good.

I had been feeling fine until Sunday morning – I had managed to escape all allergy issues up to that point. I woke up with a sore throat and it progressed from there. My nose is so stopped up I can't breathe at all. Since I can't breathe through my nose while I'm sleeping my mouth is wide open. I don't know how many times I've woke myself up because my snoring was so loud.

Last night, once again, I woke myself up snoring. Then I couldn't get back to sleep because Jay was snoring. Since he'd been having such a hard time sleeping I didn't want to wake him up so I moved to the couch. I watched a little TV and then went back to sleep. At 3 am Jay woke up and said he could hear me snoring on the couch. I kept him up for awhile with my noise.

We really need to get over our stuffed up noses or I'm afraid we're going to end up on those sleep apnea machines!

Thursday, May 12, 2011

A Lesson in Economics

Cade had saved the last of his birthday money to buy the Lego Pirates of the Caribbean game that came out Tuesday. The Lego games are huge hits around our house and he had been anticipating this for several days. I went to Springfield yesterday for the follow-up on my oral surgery back in March. I had just enough time to power shop for groceries, swing by Joanne's (my new favorite store) and then blow through Target looking for this game. I had to be back in time to get ready to go to Baccalaureate that night. At first I thought Target was out of the game, but I searched a little more and found 3 games left. I quickly grabbed an employee and got the game. I also got a free Lego set of Captain Jack and a couple of other unrecognizables that I assume are in movie #4 (which comes out May 20th if anyone is interested…Cade and I are). By this point I knew that I would only have enough time to get home, get ready and then leave again. And that is where the predicament of today's post started….

Cade knew I was looking for this game. He expected me to bring it home. I knew if I got home with it but he only had a few minutes to play it, that would make him crabby. I also knew that if I told him I had it but he couldn't open it until after Baccalaureate that would just be cruel. Cade and I don't handle anticipation well. We both like to know what's going to happen in a movie before we watch it. We still watch it; we just have to know how it's going to turn out. I also read the back of every book I ever read. I try to resist, but I can't stand it. (Any clues on why this whole adoption/infertility wait has been so hard? There's no book that I can read the back of!). So anyway, I knew that kind of anticipation would be physically painful for Cade – really, I'm telling you neither of us likes that feeling of anticipation. And Baccalaureate is long enough for the adults…can you imagine how tortuous it would be for a 9 year old knowing he has a new video game in plastic at home? That's child abuse!

So since I'm such a model parent guess what I did….yes, I lied. Actually I asked Jay to lie for me. He was supposed to tell Cade that Target was out of the game and we'd get it Thursday. Then the whole way home I wondered what I should've done. How do people who vow to never lie to their kids handle these sorts of things…then I wondered if me lying about a Lego game will someday cause him to become hooked on drugs or cause other behavioral issues. When I got home Jay hadn't lied to Cade – he forgot about the whole story I had came up with so I had to do it. Cade was very disappointed. Later I asked Jay what I should've done. Jay said that I should've told the truth and then disciplined him if/when he threw a fit about having to leave the game or if he got impatient at Baccalaureate. I'm sure Jay is right, but it wasn't that I didn't want to discipline him – I seriously thought it was cruel to say "oh, hey Cade here is the game you wanted now we have to get in the car drive 20 minutes to sit through a long church like service and then you might get one hour to play it when we get home". I still don't know what was the right answer in this situation…..

But here is where the economics lesson came in. I told Cade that Target was sold out and that I'd call the Wal-Mart's around home on Thursday to track down the game. Once you start lying there is just no end to it! He wanted to know which ones I was calling and what order…again more lies! Finally I got away from him before lightning struck me down and I went to get ready. A few minutes later Cade came in our room and said that since the stores were selling out he might not have enough money to buy it. I was only about half listening to him while looking for something to wear but I asked why he thought that. He said "well, if there is only one left then the price will go up and I won't be able to afford it." That got my attention. Somewhere in the back of my mind I was grasping at a memory…where have I heard that before. Ah yes, here it is….those long forgotten Ag Econ classes…Cade was talking about classic supply & demand. Where had he heard it?

I went to tell Jay about the brilliance of our child (even though Jay later had to help Cade get the first button started on his shirt). Jay acted nonchalant about the whole thing "oh, yeah we talked about Supply and Demand the other day".

Ok…I'm the one with the Ag Business degree and I sat through hours upon hours of Ag Econ classes….Cade's knowledge is close to surpassing mine on this subject. I'm going to have to start studying up on some things if I want to continue to be able to converse with those two. Can you imagine 9 more years of these conversations as they go back and forth to school? Guess that's what I get for lying….

Monday, May 9, 2011

Mothers Day

Mothers Day for the last several years has been a complicated day for me. Yes, I am a mother, but….I really don't know how to describe it. Even though I know I'm still as much as a mother as someone with a gaggle of children, sometimes I feel like ½ a mother. Like there is this big area of unfinished business in my life. And I know that there are thousands of women who hurt so badly on this day that I also have survivors guilt. Like I can't be happy and celebrate MD because I also hurt for those women who don't have any children. Then I feel guilty for the fact that I am a mother at all. It is such an odd day for me – and I'm sure it's that way for just about anyone who has gone through infertility. I'm just so thankful we go to a church that doesn't go overboard on MD. I've heard horror stories of church's where they do baby dedications on this day. I know it's a happy day for those parents, but oh my goodness. I would imagine most infertile couples would completely skip church that day. What a horror for them. Then 5 years ago my whole family life changed the day after Mother's Day so that has not helped my attitude towards this day for the last few years.

But, this year was ok. Actually it was the best MD I've had in quite some time. Not that we did anything special – I think it was the fact we didn't do anything. There have been years where Jay has tried to keep me busy so I didn't think about things. This year we stayed at home and caught up on laundry. It was a nice change. I didn't think about all of the other stuff in the days leading up to yesterday. It was a great feeling to be free from some of that junk. And I enjoyed the day just being at home with my two favorite boys.

Jay is such a great husband/dad. I used to work with a guy that when asked what he did for his wife on MD he'd say "nothing, she's not my mother". I'm so thankful that Jay doesn't feel that way. It is important for a child to learn from their father how to treat their mother. Jay does a great job of making sure Cade knows this. I'm so thankful for Jay!

Yesterday I woke up to pancakes cooked by Jay and Cade. Then Cade gave me the gift that he made me at school. It was a coupon book with different things in it. Jay and I got a good laugh out of them….Pick up the house, Make your bed, Let you watch the TV for one whole day, Leave you alone…and our absolute favorite – Try to wash the dog. Charlie is an outdoor dog so he never gets a bath. We never wash the dog. We asked Cade why he put that one in there and he said it was time for lunch and he had to finish so he copied it from someone else. Jay teased Cade and told him he was writing coupons that he couldn't cash.

The rest of the day I piddled around and helped Jay with the laundry. Normally I'm the head laundry person, Jay helps but I'm usually in charge. It was nice to not be in charge for a change. I sat outside and read and took a nap and then worked on another purse. It was a wonderfully uneventful day!

Thursday, May 5, 2011

Happy Birthday Jay!

Yes, Jay is a Cinco de Mayo baby, but sadly he's never celebrated with a Mexican Fiesta.  Next year his birthday will be on a Saturday so make plans now - Mexican at our house!  This year he is having take-out Chinese.  Things have been a little hectic this week and once again I've turned our family room into a sweat shop....I was going to make his favorite - Sweet & Sour Meatballs but they are extremely labor intensive.  It's more of a weekend meal when I have more time.  So instead he's getting Sweet & Sour Chicken and a raincheck on the meatballs.  But he knows I love him anyway! 

So in honor of 34 years I'm reposting one of my favorite pictures.  This was from 2007 - Cade's first year of Coach's Pitch

And Jay - It's time to put away the "you're older than me" jokes for yet another year.  I know you love those 47 days of the year when I am older than you, but that time has drawn to a close.  We are both equally old now!   

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

Some more adoption humor...

As you know (because I've talked it about in the last several posts) I'm working on a new profile book.  I'm about 90% done with it.  I need a few more pictures from this coming weekend and I should
be able to wrap it up.

A couple of weeks ago we said yes to having our profile shown to a mom who's not due for awhile.  I have no idea when she was going to look at them and since her due date is so far away I'm not really expecting an answer very soon.  But at times my mind wanders and I'm very curious if she has made a decision.  I'm not going to email the agency because the second I do that they always phone in with their decision and it's never us.  So I'm just waiting and wondering on occassion.  But this one has not tore me up the way a lot of the others do so that is a welcome change.  Today though I was a little curious.  In a roundabout way I decided to get some info from our caseworker.  I told her I had our new profiles almost ready and needed to know how many to order.  I was really hoping she'd read my email and I'd get a phone call back saying DON'T HIT THAT ORDER BUTTON....you've been picked but we were going to wait a little closer to her due date, etc.  Do you think that's what happened today?

No, it wasn't.  Instead I got an email back that said  Why don't you order 4 or 5.  Yeah, sure...I'll get right on that.   

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Our weekend....and more profile pictures....

After a wild night at Prom (we left at 10 pm wooo!) I went to Sheldon on Satruday to get some profile pictures.  Jay went to a farm auction that was down the road and then a cattle sale on Sunday.  I think he enjoyed his free time while Cade and I were gone!  Poor Cade kept asking me how many more pictures did he have to take?  I've done a lot of internet research on profiles and one bit advice I got was to keep your pictures new.  Don't use a picture if it looks really dated...like not even your wedding if it was over 5 years ago.  So in keeping with that theme I'm trying to use pictures taken within the year.  I snuck in a couple of vacation pictures but they were still within the 5 year time frame.  And with Cade it's even more important to keep the pictures new.  He changes overnight so I don't want the families looking at our book to think Cade is still little and we walk in with a giant 9 year old.  That meant I had to redo all the pictures we had with Cade and our parents.  But we had a good weekend, got to spend some time with Avery and Lawson and I got some pictures of them also.....

Papa Kerry got a new tractor this spring.  I thought his last one was big, but this one is enormous!  Unfortunatley it was too wet to do anything this weekend, but Cade got to ride with him when he pulled it in the barn.  I got a laugh though remembering what we used to do when we were kids....Dad would pick us up at Kathy and Clints on his motorcycle.  Charity would ride in the front and I'd hang on for dear life on the back.  No helmets.  It was the longset 1 mile ride home.  Or we'd hang onto the side of of tractors without cabs bumping along the road.  You'll notice in this picture that Cade's seat has a seat belt.  When Dad started the tractor Cade asked where his belt was because he couldn't find it.  Dad told him he didn't need it because they were only going about 10 feet....things have changed a lot through the years!  Thankfully the importance of farm safety is one of them!

 Mom and Cade....You can tell Cade was hot in this picture, his cheeks are red and he was done with being the subject of a photo shoot! 

Avery's cat had baby kittens sometime around Easter.  Here they are checking them out.  It looks like the Mama cat is ready to swat anyone who is brave enough to stick their hands in the box.

I wanted to get a picture of me with Avery and Lawson.  It's really hard getting two little kids to photograph well.  I love this one because of Lawson's hair.  Finally on Sunday I realized what his nickname should be...Chuckles as in Chuckles the Clown.  He has some wild hair!

Lawson loves tractors!

And who doesn't love a baby squat?

Prom 2011

This past Friday Jay and I went to Prom at the Pythian Castle in Springfield.  We usually go every couple of years...typically it's a cheap meal, there are other adults to talk to we don't see very often, and it's a fun occassion to get dressed up.  Actually typing that makes me feel a little pathetic....we have to go to a school dance and listen to horrible music to have a social life???  And yes, I just said that the music was horrible.  I'm officially old.  When I went to my Senior Prom 16 years ago I would've never dreamed I'd admit that.  The music was too loud, I couldn't understand the words and all the songs sounded alike.  We stood at the wall with the West's and talked about the good old college days and how they don't make music like they used to.   We sounded like we were in our 80's instead of just our early 30's.  When we weren't talking about the good old days we were looking and updating Facebook on our phones.  Is that not ironic?  But the kids looked like they had a good time, that's the important thing....and my ears will eventually recover.  I think the most used word by the adults that night was "Huh?" 

I felt like such a Prom Nerd asking Julie to take our picture...an adult (who does not have a child there) who has a camera at prom might be considered creepy or weird.....but it's for the profile!  You sacrifice all your pride when working on a profile book - you have to ask someone to take your picture over and over until it looks right.  Thankfully all of our photographers have been very patient with us (Thanks Julie!).  The adults on the other side of the room probaby thought what weird-o's.....If only they knew...

And here we are at Prom 2011.....