Friday, March 11, 2011

The Lovebug

Good or Bad I'm afraid the Lovebug has made an appearance in the 3rd grade.  I don't believe I'm real happy about it's appearance.  Thankfully so far Cade has escaped it's evil clutches.  I am so not looking forward to getting into this kind of stuff.

It started Wednesday.  Jay came home and told me he had something really funny to tell me when we were alone.  We ended up running into town for dinner that night.  I don't know what it is about being in a car, but that is Cade's prime time for talking.  At home, unless it is something he wants to talk about, he's like a clam but put him in a car and it is all talk all the time.  So on the way into town Cade started talking about some of the boys in the class who have girlfriends.  So far two boys say they have one, but he couldn't remember what girl one of the boys said was his girlfriend.  I thought that was funny - it's not like there are so many girls in the glass that you can't keep them straight.  So I asked about another boy and if he had a girlfriend.  Cade said he didn't but he told me the boy said "I don't have a girl friend" and it was in a disappointed voice.  I guess that boy wants one?  Then I asked Cade if he wanted a girl friend and he said No (thank you!!) then I asked if there were any girls that wanted him to be their boyfriend.  He reminded me that the girl who did want to be his girlfriend was named Lydia (who has since moved away) and she was weird because she said she was a vampire.  That was then a good opportunity for us to turn the conversation into what you look for in a boyfriend/girlfriend.  We explained that it is very important to find someone with the same moral values as you - especially going to church.  That seemed to be like a light bulb for him.  He said he got it, but then he wanted to know how you found out that stuff about a person.  We explained that you would talk to them and get to know them and then you would find out.  Then he told us that if he ever had a girlfriend someday she would not have one of those things in her nose (nose ring).  We said ok...and then I decided to push it a little and ask another question.  I'm never sure how many questions I get so I have to use them wisely...I asked about his feelings on tattoos.  He said he is ok with them as long as no one can see them. 

That whole conversation cracked me up.  I love it when I get these brief opportunities to view the workings of his mind.  I'm not sure if it is because he is a boy or if it is him or a combo of the two, but if he doesn't want to talk he won't talk.  There is no amount of pulling/pushing I can do to get him to tell me about his day at school unless he wants to share it.  So I really have to take advantage of these times when he is willing to talk.  I love it!

Later on I finally got the opportunity to ask Jay about the funny story.  He said that Cade had talked to him about the boyfriend/girlfriend thing.  Cade said "Dad, lets just keep this between the two of us.  We don't need to tell mom".  Jay said Cade asked him how a person got a girlfriend.  It scared me a little because I'm not ready for Cade to even think about a girlfriend.  Jay had a good point, he doesn't think that was why Cade wanted to know.  Cade is probably looking at it from this point of view....If he wants something (like a toy) he buys how does one go about getting a girlfriend?  That made sense and made me feel better. 

Hopefully we convinced him that waiting until college to get a girlfriend would be the best thing. 

AND for those who see Cade on a regular basis  - do not ask him about this.  It will embarrass him.

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