A week in pictures

I know my post from yesterday may not seem like it, but it hasn't been all doom and gloom in our household.  After our first loss last February I felt like I would never smile or laugh again.  It was awful.  Thankfully I didn't feel so much like that this time.  I have smiled and I have laughed.  Even as early as last Saturday I laughed quite hard.  I'll post about that seperately, I may even have to put the video on the blog.  It concerned Cade and basketball and shoe tying.  It was funny and quite embarassing for Jay and I.  Nothing like a whole gym full of parents knowing you have failed in your parental duties. 
I'm not sure why these pictures are so fuzzy.  Normally my iPhone takes better pictures than our crappy camera.  This was Tuesday night, January 4 - the date that we have lived and breathed since the Arkansas/LSU game.  It was the Sugar Bowl!  I came home from work that day to find our living room decorated.  I tried to get a picture of the decorators but remember what I said about Cade and the dorky poses?  He struck again...



So I tried again.  You can't tell it in this fuzzy one, but you can just read it on his face that he is really working hard to control himself and not go into another weird pose.

   The seat cushion that Jay is not at all embarassed to tote into the games.  I think seat cusions at ball games are a defining moment in a person's life.  You know you have finally reached a pivotal moment when you are willing to say that the comfort of my butt overrides my need to look young and cool so I'm buying a seat cushion.  So far I've resisted that but after Cade's first basketball game last week I may soon be crossing over to the other side.....  And the Razorback helmet that gets brought from Cade's room into the family room every game.


And a mug and a sign.  Yes, that is making tape holding the sign on my oak endtable.  I'm trying to practice self control....so I didn't say anything about it.  Yes, it was very hard.





Cade's first basketball game was last Saturday.  We had an hour break between the two games.  This is how the boys occupied themselves.  Those are Avon magazines.



Jay and Cade missed three days of school this week because of snow.  So they can forget about their 4 day weekend in February.  You may wonder why we don't have a cover on our grill.  I don't know why myself.  I wonder than on a daily basis but yet never think to buy one. 




Work also kept me quite busy this past week.  We had to get these files...

and these files...

Up these stairs.  I promise that had nothing at all to do with me calling in Thursday. I did move my fair share on Tuesday and Wednesday.   But I wasn't too upset when I got to work Friday and saw that it was all done.



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New Look

I've changed the background in honor of the county fair this weekend. Cade's chickens are somewhere over 7 pounds I think. I'm sure Jay will correct me if I'm wrong. When Jim and Sharon's chickens are 6 weeks old they weigh about 4 pounds. We have some seriously overweight birds. Luckily the weather has cooled down a bit because it was quite a challenge for Jay to keep his chunky chickens cool enough so they wouldn't die of heart attacks.

Today Jay is weighing his kid's chickens so they can figure out what ones to put in the show. Our chickens have their legs marked by plastic bands - we have blue left, red right, yellow right, etc. Jay said Cade is really getting into helping him pick out what birds they should enter. He was saying that red right was looking good but blue left was looking like he was getting bigger. Jay said it was really funny to hear him talk about the birds.

I'll be sure to post a picture of these giants after the fair. I know everyone is on the edge of their seats waiting to see them.

Busy Times

Things have been a little crazy around our house the last week. I've wanted to get these pictures on the blog, but haven't had a chance until today to get them from the camera onto the computer. Baseball started Monday night. It didn't go so well. Jay was really disgusted by the teams showing that night - the other Miller team had 6 kids who could catch the ball and throw the runners out. We had one kid (Benjamin) singing about poop in the outfield and another digging his way to China in the dirt by 3rd base. I'm really hoping tonight goes better. Here's a picture of the two baseball boys from Monday night.

Another thing causing some excitement around the house this week was something Cade won at school. Yes, Cade is now in possession of a 5lb Hershey Bar. It doesn't even fit on the shelf in our refrigerator. Cade was so proud of it on Monday. Jay brought him by the office after school so everyone could ooh and ahh over it. Really, it is quite impressive. No one at FCS had ever seen anything like it.






On Tuesday he couldn't stand it anymore and we opened it. I chiseled off two tiny squares and I don't think he's thought about it since then. What in the world are we going to do with 5 lbs of chocolate?

The other bit of excitement is that Cade got strep throat again. We have an appointment with an ENT on June 12. I'm pretty sure we'll be looking at tonsillectomy before school starts again. We haven't told Cade that yet because any time you bring up tonsils he gets worked up. Considering this will be his 3rd surgery you'd think he'd be a pro at it by now. I'll keep you posted on how that goes.

And you may be wondering how track and field day went. I think it went really good. He won 1st place in the Long Jump which is exciting because my dad held the state record in the Long Jump for several years. Maybe he's found his sport???

Sharing Something on my Heart

I’ve had this blog for 1 ½ years and I’ve always tried to steer of the topic I’m going to post about today. My parents are separated and have been for almost three years. I’ve never mentioned much about it on here because I’m a Peacekeeper. I don’t like to hurt feelings or make people feel worse than they already do. I like to go along not rocking the boat and running myself ragged trying to make everyone else happy. Most of the time this is done at the expense of my own sanity. Things have been rough on Jay and I the last four years. Not only have we been struggling with the pain of infertility we’ve also struggled with the hurt of watching my family crumble around us. I keep telling myself at least we have our health. That is something I repeat daily sometimes several times in one day to keep from completely losing my mind. That’s why I freak out when one of us gets the sniffles –if one of us were loose our health too how would I survive?

I read something one time about the difference between a Peacekeeper and a Peacemaker. A Peacekeeper tries to keep the peace by whatever means they can. A Peacemaker makes peace by their actions. Sometimes they may not be popular with what they have to say but it’s the truth. I’m going to take a leap here to the side of the Peacemaker and make a statement - My parents have let Satan get a grip on them and at this point he is the only one who is victorious…not Charity and I, not their grandchildren and certainly not my parents. We are in a lose-lose situation and generations of our family will be affected.

A couple of weeks ago I came across the title of a book called I Do Again by Cheryl and Jeff Scruggs. Connected to this book in Amazon was a blog written by Cheryl. I clicked on a random blog entry and read this. That fits our family to a T. Not only did it speak to me about the family situation but also about some doubt I was having about the adoption. Are we seeking our own timetable or God’s? Why do we put time limits and constraints on things that are out of our control? Cheryl challenges us to ponder Deuteronomy 8:1-10. You can read it here.

I read it this morning and it brought me to tears. It reminds me that God is leading me through this to humble me so that when he brings me out I will praise Him for what He has given me. He will do for me what He did for the Israelites thousands of years ago. Why can’t my parents see that the Lord is with them? We have to do this on God’s timeframe and not our own.

Tomorrow night Charity and I have a joint counseling session with my parents. In my heart I know we are going to be discussing how things will be after divorce. I’m 31 (almost 32) years old and I get physically ill seeing the breakup of my family. This is selfish, but I also get ill thinking about holidays and birthdays and all those other family events. What will happen now? I have never in my life hated satan as much as I do right now, but honestly I’ve never felt his presence as much as I do right now either.

We could all use your thoughts and prayers over the next few days. Please pray that God softens my parents hearts towards each other, their marriage and towards Charity and I and the couple counseling us. Please pray that Charity and I and the couple we are meeting with have the wisdom to say the right things and that we all speak in love and not anger.

I’ll leave this somewhat jumbled post with a few thoughts on marriage. You can check out this post on stuffchristianslike about marriage. It is a good reminder that just because you feel like your marriage is secure doesn’t mean that you can quit working on it. That’s when satan attacks. We all know that he likes nothing better than to break up Christian marriages. I’ll leave you with a comment from that post that I think is a good reminder for those couples who say they’ve fallen out of love with their spouse. Everything we do is a choice and we have to decide if it’s worth fighting for or not. For me, my family is worth fighting for….even if it means waiting on God’s perfect time instead of my own timetable.

The best marriage advice I ever received was at my wedding shower when my grandma looked at me and told me, "You will fall in and out of love with your husband many many times during your marriage. The only thing that matters are the choices you make inbetween those times. And don't worry during those 'dry spells'. You will always always ALWAYS fall back into love."
It was so interesting to hear her say that. Her 50th Wedding Anniversary is coming up soon, and I have to tell you that advice coming from a woman like her isn't anything I would take lightly……….love isn't a feeling, it's a choice. What you do when you aren't feeling 'lovey dovey' is the measure of your integrity within your marriage. No matter what is going on between the two of you, if you trust Jesus and maintain that he is your Savior, he will help you reach level ground with your spouse again. He requires us to love with purpose and decision, not to love passively and with a hope that the warm fuzzy 'feelings' will carry us through the tough moments. from comment on stufffchristianslike.com

Laugh for the Day...or at least it makes me laugh....

This morning I came to work and did my normal routine. I got on MSNBC and browsed the main headlines for the day. In the entertainment section there were a lot of pictures and stories about Tom Cruise's new movie. I'm not a big fan of Tom, his acting has never impressed me and I'm sure that I'll never see this movie. Honestly I'm not even sure what the movie is about. I know he's a German during WWII, but that's about it. Even if I was a fan and planned on seeing Valkyrie I don't think I could watch it without laughing because of the movie Valiant. Have you ever seen Valiant? Cade has it and he went through a stage a couple of years ago where he watched it over and over and over. It was a Disney movie about Pigeon's during WWII. It was a decent movie. I don't think it was one of Disney's big money makers like The Little Mermaid or Cars, but it was an all right movie. The only problem is that it might make people who have seen Valiant have a hard time taking Tom's new movie seriously. Really who could look at this.....

and not compare it to this from Valiant

It's the first thing that comes to mind everytime I hear or see anything related to Valkyrie. That is the Fowler sense of humor coming out in me.

Weather

I haven't been good at updating the blog recently. I still have pictures from Charlotte that I want to post. We went to Billy Graham's library and have some neat ones from there. That was probably one of my favorite things about the whole trip. I also need to post some pictures of Cade from this past weekend. He was Joseph on our chuch float for the Christmas parade. He took his job very seriously.

The reason why I haven't been able to do anything with the pictures is because they're at home and I'm stuck at work. I've spent the last few nights with mom because of the nasty weather we've had. I have about a 35 + mile drive to work each day. When the weather gets bad it stresses me out because I'm afraid of having a wreck or getting hit by another car or going off in a ditch and not having cell service. It wouldn't bother me to drive it as long as I could be the only car on the road. Since that's not an option I've stayed here. Also this time of year is busy with people deciding they want loans at the last minute and co-workers trying to use up vacation time. I sacrificed time with my family so that I wouldn't stress anyone out at work. The sacrifice ends today, I'm going home. FCS will have to deal with it if I can't make it to work, but I really don't think I'll have a problem. I'm thinking that the worst maybe over???

Tomorrow I have the follow up with the urologist so I'll have some more information about the kidney stone. I'm not looking forword to tomorrow's appointment....To start with the waiting room is always packed, when I go I wait for at least an hour before I even get to go back to a room. Then I feel a little odd while I'm waiting - the waiting room is 95% men over the age of 70. I'm a 31 year old female so I know people are looking at me wondering why I'm there. The only plus about the weather is that maybe some of the other patients won't want to get out in it tomorrow? Ok that's a little mean - hoping that the older patients won't make their appointments because of the snow and ice. I guess the waiting thing could go either way. I'll just have to wait and see. My appointment is at 1:00 so hopefully I'll be done by 3:00???? It's always a toss up.

Get out and vote

Have you voted today?

Jay, Cade and I were at the polls by 7:00 this morning. If you didn't vote before going to work make sure you do it on your way home. Go put a sticky note on your steering wheel right now so you'll remember.

Vacation

Starting today at 2:00 pm I'm on vacation until Tuesday morning at 8:00 am. I am so looking forward to having a few days off. I'm a little burnt out with my job so I'm hoping after a few days off I'll have a better attitude on Tuesday. Things have been really busy since the first of the year and I'm spending close to 80% of my time there alone.

But even though I'm on "vacation" my time off won't be restful. I've got a whole list of things I want to get done around the house. We are having our annual church party on Sunday evening. We still have some outdoor work to do, along with painting our doors, shopping for the food, cleaning the house, preparing the food, etc. You get the picture. Tomorrow night is Jay's FFA Banquet so we've been spending most of our evenings at the school working on the slide show. Friday Cade has his Track and Field day so I'll go to at least part of that (I'll blog more later about the Track and Field day). I'm off to work some more on the slide show. Everyone have a safe and happy Memorial Day!!!

Random Thoughts From Yesterday

I was going through C's backpack and he had a book wrapped in plastic that had an envelope in it. The envelope said "Attention Teachers - sponsor cards enclosed". In the envelope are three postcards already addressed to business in town. Are we supposed to write a Thank You to these businesses? I said "C, what in the world are we supposed to do with this book?" His reply - "Read it I guess" Not even 6 yet and he's already a smart mouth!

Sharon and I were talking about the cookbooks Terry gave us for Christmas. As soon as C heard the word Cookbook, he informed me that I could order a Imus Ranch Cookbook off of RFDTV. J's got C watching Imus in the mornings. C can spot an RFDTv piece of merchandise from a mile away - and he spotted one a few days ago. We were in a restaurant and he started pointing and talking very loudley about a man's RFDTV hat. Maybe we should tape C giving his spill about Imus Ranch Foods and send it to RFDTV. C would probably be their cutest spokesperson.

J's favorite thing that happened yesterday - After work I called him and said "I'm really worried about C's worrying".......and the cycle continues....

Some Things on My Mind

There have been a couple of issues on my mind the last few days. Please think about adding these to your own prayer lists.

1. There is a 9 year old girl who is missing from this area. Her step-father put her to bed around 11:00 p.m. Friday night and then left the house for a few hours. When he got home he didn't check on her and they realized around 9:00 Sat morning that she was missing. They thought she was at a friends house so they didn't report her missing until Saturday evening. I've been thinking a lot about this little girl and I saw her mom on the news last night. I just can not imagine what this family is going through.

2. On the news yesterday morning there was a story about some families who were planning on adopting from Guatemala. Due to some legal things that I don't fully understand those adoptions aren't looking good. Guatemala will be stopping all adoptions so they can reform their adoption system. Right now the families that are waiting will hopefully be grandfathered in. Most of these families have already been matched, some have already met their children. I feel for them because they already have a face and a name for their children and now it is uncertain if/when they will be able to bring them home.

About the Tickers

I know, it looks like I went a little ticker crazy yesterday. At lunch yesterday I decided I'd try to make one and they were so easy I just kept making them. Once we finally get to the "officially waiting" part of our adoption I'm going to make one to count the wait. If you've never seen one before they're pretty neat. You put in a date and the ticker updates the countdown each day. I'm not a big Halloween person, we do let C dress up, but I was just in the mood to make tickers yesterday. Only 2 months, 3 weeks and 1 day until Christmas!

Leaving Comments

I've had some questions on how to leave comments so I left one this morning to see how it works. At the end of each post to the left there is the date and time that I posted it (which usually isn't correct for some reason) and then next to it is a line that most of the time says 0 comments.
1. Click on 0 comments
2. The next screen will show a box on the right side where you can leave a comment
3. Below that box are three choices to choose your identity
4. Choose the middle one that says other
5. You can type your name on the next screen if you want, if you don't just click on publish your comment. Your comment will attach to the post and I can view it.

When it says 1 (2, 3, etc)comments that shows someone has left a comment. When you click on it you'll also be able to read all the comments that have been left.

Why I'm Using Initials

When I first told J I was going to start a blog he wanted me to be careful about using our names and giving away the location of where we live. I agree with not wanting to say anything about where we live and because of what I've named the blog using our initials is probably the best thing. When I talk about other people I'll proabably use their first name, but I won't give out any other information. I'm sure that in a couple of weeks I'll post some pictures from a certain little girl's birthday party and saying Happy Birthday A won't be the same as using her name.