Last Day of School

This may end up being one of the “feel sorry for myself posts”. I’m not quite sure how it will end up, but right now I feel a little sad. Today is Cade’s last day of Kindergarten. I can’t believe that when I see him next, he’ll be a First Grader. I remember two years ago, when we’d reached that all important one year mark of trying to have another baby, saying how I was going to go buy myself a brand new Mustang on Cade’s first day of school. I couldn’t imagine sending my baby off without another baby at home. I honestly didn’t think it would happen, I thought we’d have a baby before that day. But if we didn’t I at least had a back up plan in mind – who wouldn’t feel better if they had a new car? Well I ended up getting a new car a couple of months before that, but it still wasn’t a Mustang and it wasn’t brand new and we still didn’t have a baby on his first day. Now here I sit, 9 months later and Cade is out of Kindergarten and we still don’t have another baby. I guess I never imagined it would go on for quite this long. I know there are people who wait much, much longer than we have – I just didn’t think we’d be one of those. (Now I’m sitting here at work tearing up typing on my computer. It’s a good thing Tom appears to be on a phone call that could take awhile. I can get control before he walks back in here.)

Ok, I had to go to the bathroom for a little while to collect myself. As I was coming out I heard my cell ringing. It was Jay, he had been at Cade’s end of the year BBQ. I really started crying then. A little later Tom came out to ask if I was ok. I told him I’m just being a mom because I’m sad it’s the last day of school. Of course since Tom is single and childless he knew exactly how to comfort me “yeah, before you know it he’ll be graduating” Uh, thanks for that reminder. I just hope we have a baby before that day comes. If not, I may have to take a leave of absence during Cade’s last month of school and be medicated during the graduation ceremony. I wish Sandra was here today – we’d be laughing and crying about this at the same time.

Ok, I have to stop typing now because I’m starting to cry again. Where’s someone with a funny story when you need them?