Thursday, August 12, 2010

NEDC Consult

Today I had the phone consult with the doctor from the NEDC. Not to complain about money, but we spent $60 on a phone call that didn't tell me anything more than what I already knew. One thing about adoption (besides the wait) that will drive a person crazy is the nickel and diming that occurs. Not that it is anyone's fault – it's just the way it goes. When someone decides to adopt they go into knowing that it is going to be expensive. The agency will give you a list of their fees and you'll take a big gulp and sign your name on the contract. What no one tells you is that those fees are only a part of what you will pay. Or at least Jay and I were totally unprepared for all of the "little" things that you must also pay for. I would hate to guess how much all of these little things have added up to be over the last three years.

Again, I'm not complaining, I'm just stating that this is a fact of adoption. I just want anyone who reads this blog who may be thinking about adoption to know about this extra stuff. It also doesn't help that we have waited almost three years – that adds to the cost because of the multiple profiles we've copied and the number of updates we'd had to do…

Color copies of a 10 page front and back profile (lost track of the number of times this has been copied)

Covers for the profiles

Mailing the profile to St Louis and KC

Being fingerprinted for the 4th stinking time

Paying for the 3rd homestudy update (4th time a person has been in our home)

The additional medical costs because we had to repeat everything after waiting two years:

Blood Tests to once again prove we do not have an STD

TB test



Will have to have more blood tests before the November transfer because ours will expire in September to again prove we don't have an STD even though I was just tested in May.


I'm sure I'm missing some stuff in here, but this should be the majority of it. None of that includes the other "extras" spent on the embryo adoption.


I guess I'm just frustrated today. We are staring in the face of our 3rd homestudy update, the 4th time someone will come into our home and inspect it and inspect us. Our old social worker left Bethany last fall, right after our last update, so we will have someone new this time. That brings on a whole other list of concerns because Pam was so easy going. What will the new one be like?


Back to the phone call, I somewhat digressed there….Dr. Keenan said there was nothing that he would've changed about the transfer. Everything went very well. The only thing that could've been better was the quality of the embryos. I already knew that. I had already thought about the embryo quality, but really does it matter? If it was God's plan for it to have worked it wouldn't have matter what the quality was. It just happened that having the embryos survive wasn't part of His plan. I am just praying that us having another baby is part of His plan at some point because right now I'm not sure that it is….

1 comment:

embieadoptmom said...

I agree-God is in control and all embryos matter despite their quality. WOW, you have been through a lot! HUGS!