Swimming with the Fish

Last night there was a Sophia the First special in Disney. Camryn was watching it and I was in the kitchen. She got so excited because Sophia was swimming with Ariel. I had to stop what I was

doing and sit down with her. She talked and talked about seeing Ariel and going swimming. She said that she and I were

going to swim with Ariel that night. I asked her what color her fins were going to be. She said they would be blue and mine would be purple. 

She was so excited. This was probably the first time I've ever heard her talk that much about one thing and to use her imagination like she was. It was pretty neat. She was jabbering on about the blue fins and then she said (full of excitement) "and I will have  nipples."  Apparently, since Ariel wears a bikini top Camryn thought it meant she would also have the same thing?  It tickled me. 

As soon as Jay and Cade got home I asked Camryn what she needed to swim with Ariel. Her answer didn't disappointment me. She quickly replied "blue fins and nipples."  Jay walked out of the room mumbling something about not wanting to hear anymore. 

Hey What's the Big Idea

That is one of Camryn's phrases. I love every time I hear her exclaim it. Yes, it is yet another thing she learned from TV. 

But it seems fitting for how I feel today after reading blog #573 of why it is or isn't ok to start listening to Christmas songs. Really...why do I need a complete strangers approval or disapproval if I feel like listening to Bing Crosby non-stop starting now or last June?  I actually skimmed a blog post stating that they were against it because they were never allowed to listen to them as children prior to Thanksgiving but then decided this year it was ok to listen to them now because they are peaceful. The author stated it was ok because she was remembering the reason why we celebrate Christmas, etc, etc, etc. 

I guess it struck me as a little self righteous and a whole lot of annoying. And yes I realize I'm judging them just like I'm annoyed at them for judging me, but what gives people the gall to say what is always right and what is always wrong. I guess my Bible left out the chapter in the Gospels adding the 11th commandment...thou shall not put up a single piece of holly nor sing along with Bing prior to Thanksgiving. 

I realize I don't talk about my faith on here all the time or have sticky sweet posts talking about different heart issues I or my neighbors have. I'm just not that kind of person. I'm not sticky sweet and I don't try to make every post book material.  I don't plan to make everyone who reads my posts think wow, her heart is so great and mine is crap.  Don't get me wrong- I read a lot of great blogs by Christian women whom I love. I also have read some that raise my blood sugar level 100 pts. 

So here it is in a nutshell. I'm a Christian and I love The Lord. I also love Christmas and Christmas music and buying presents and decorating my house and looking at lights and Christmas decorations at the mall. I love hearing Christmas songs play while I'm shopping and I love looking at the greenery swags hanging from the mall ceiling. I also love red, orange and brown leaves and pilgrims and turkeys and the pumpkins on my bookshelf. And the holidays to me are just wrapped up in one gloriously wonderful time of the year full of beautiful scenery, great music (Bing Crosby Christmas on Pandora), fun times with family and friends and really cheesy but oh so fun to watch movies on Hallmark. It is also marked by the stressful, fun, and sobering time of organizing and putting on our live nativity at church. Do you know how many times I've worked the music while shivering wondering at the awe of Mary giving birth next to animals?  Was it cold?    Was she shivering between labor pains? Our little rendition is pretty great so how much more awesome would the real thing had been like in Bethlehem? Yes, all real thoughts I've pondered...I also usually have the music I want to use picked out prior to Thanksgiving.  Honestly I really don't try to separate all of these in my mind. They are just one large wonderful event to me.

I know not everyone loves Christmas music and that is ok. But don't confuse your dislike of it with Christmas becoming too commercialized. Just because I love it and could listen to it in June doesn't mean I have no idea what the true meaning of Christmas is. Also, don't imply that I'm making it not so special by not saving my decorations or music until exactly 25 days prior. I look at it as I'm extending that wonderful time period for as long as I can without looking weird. Because we've all wondered about the house still plugging in their lights in March...but it does make me smile when I see that.  

So I say crank up the Bing, plug in the lights, throw the ceramic turkeys down on the table and just enjoy this time of year. Every single feather, pilgrim hat made out of construction paper, dry turkey, Christmas lights, and carols possible this year. AND if you still feel like Bing January 2nd then go for it!!! You might just keep your volume down so the people next to you at work don't think you are completely crazy. 

And because I can't let this go- why would you ever outlaw your kids from listening to Christmas songs?  Metallica, Marilyn Manson and whatever other creepy group you can think of yes by all means don't allow that in your house- but Jingle Bells on Nov 1??? In sorry, but that is a little weird. 

How much she has grown...

We got a rocking horse for Camryn's 2nd Birthday. She was terrified of it. We had to put it in a corner of her room and forget about it. This morning she was trying to ride a stuffed horse so I got the rocking horse out for her. She loved it. And her feet were touching the carpet and her knees were even a little bent. This picture was taken at her birthday party May 26th. My baby is growing up!

The terrible almost 2.5 year old

After a summer of wanting to drive by my house almost every night, Camryn seemed to calm down. I didn't dread going home nearly as much this fall as I did all summer. I really did not want to go home most evenings. You can think I'm terrible if you want - but I'm just keeping it real. Camryn drove me nuts for 3-4 very long months. Then September hit and it was like I got my sweet girl back. She was fun, I enjoyed being around her and taking her places again. Then this weekend hit and we seem to be headed into another rocky parenting stretch. Being a parent is nothing but a big cycle of different things. You get past one hump only to have something else take its place. 

 Saturday, after an all night lock-in where Jay and I split up our time so neither would be completely miserable, I left the house to get my hair done. I felt a little bad about it, but not a lot....but at least enough to text Jay while I was processing to ask if they were doing ok. It took awhile for him to respond. This is what I got back....Yes, after I changed the poopy diaper, cleaned up the water in the kitchen chair (which had been poured from one mixing cup to another), then stopped her from bathing Mickey in the upside down princess bed. Oh...I was sorry I asked. 

 So this weekend the wrath of her daddy was turned on. She has turned into a snotty pants who is getting in to things that she knows better than to do. The wooden spoon had to make its appearance. With Cade it really didn't take long to get him out of this snotty stage, but I think Camryn is going to take longer. Last night I told her if she didn't come here right now I would spank her. She obliged but as she was laying down so I could change her she said "this is fun." I asked what was fun and she said "spankings, I like spankings." Ok - she is going to be a bit more difficult to discipline than her brother. 

 Then on top of the snotty/dirty look phase she is back into her ornery destructive pattern. Last night she opened the truck door, while the truck was moving. She also unscrewed a light bulb from a Christmas strand of lights and stuck her finger in it...while the lights were plugged in. And she got some song lyrics mixed up and was singing about a monkey being drunk and sliding down an elephants trunk. 

 No wonder I just got my hair colored Saturday and I already saw a gray strand peeking out of it today. This girl is going to gray me quickly....but oh her sweet little hugs are so worth it all. This is the look that Jay refers to as being on the prowl for something to destroy.

Last football game...finally

We had our last football game this weekend. And in our true fashion of course it had to go out with a bang. If you know me at all you know that two things that I like least of all are football and traveling in a group. This weekend I endured two days of both of those. Fun times, fun times...

The boys actually did very well. I'm sure the other parents would tell you they weren't surprised. Jay and I are honest enough to tell you we about fell over when we won our two games Saturday. We played for first place Sunday afternoon. The boys didn't win that game, but we were still proud of them. For the briefest of brief moments I allowed myself to be the tiniest bit sad about watching Cade play football for the last time. When we got in the van to head home Cafe said "well I might play again next year."  There may have been some tears shed. 

On the group traveling. I do not like it. I'm somewhat of a lone wolf. I prefer to travel in a small circle. Sixty of us crowding around a buffet stresses me out. I mean it seriously stresses me. I can not handle the chaos. Jay told me I wouldn't make it as a teacher.  I'm well aware of that. That's why I work in a building full of other adults. Lunch there does not cause

Panic attacks. At least we had our own room. If I had to share with another boy I would've had a meltdown. I tried explaining it this way to Jay. There are

some things I prefer to keep private-

Like how I look first thing in the morning. I will share every part of our fertility story without batting an eye, but I do not want Cade's friends parents to see me without my makeup. 

I did have a good time going to Wal Mart with one of the other moms and her 4 yr old and new baby. I find their 4 year old to be extremely interesting to watch. He makes me laugh because he is all boy. I didn't mind helping, but I was so glad

we didn't have Camryn. Thanks to Jim and Sharon for watching her. We all (Camryn included) enjoyed our weekend with her being back home. 

Happy Halloween!

We had a little cheerleader last night. We bought this outfit  for Avery for her 2nd or 3rd birthday. I know when I bought it my heart was in some of the worst of our infertility pain. I actually bought it right after Christmas and held on to it for 6 months. At the time I wasn't sure

I believed we would ever have another baby. I certainly never would've let  myself dream that someday I would have a little girl that Avery could pass it back to.  Time marched on and I forgot about the Chiefs uniform. 

This fall when we were talking costumes I was thinking Cinderella or Dorothy. But that would've required work!  I was going through Camryn closet and found this. I decided it would be an easy way out this year. I still didn't think about it much until last

night when we were Trick or Treating. It hit me how God is still redeeming things in my life from that time period. It took almost 5 years from when I bought this  to see it. I still remember the feeling of that pain but I'm so thankful that it has been replaced with happiness. With all the controversy with Halloween in Christian circles God used it to once again remind me of His love for me. 

And how perfect that the year Camryn could wear it the Chiefs are 8-0. That is definitely a God thing!  Haha!!