Monday, July 23, 2012

My slip must be showing which means my husband wasn't truthful with me....

This post may be more for those of you that remember the strict clothing guidelines of my mother and grandmother’s generation…it’s also the same generations that have caused me to never ever even think about white before Easter or after Labor Day no matter how many times Clinton and Stacy say it is ok. It’s not going to happen in my world. So….Do people still wear slips anymore? I still do, but maybe that is because I don’t like my underwear showing through my dresses and skirts….or the fact I can still see my mom and Grandma Ewing looking over the dresses I was trying on for Easter and knowing a slip was non-negotiable. Obviously others don’t have the same worries because I’ve seen countless pairs of undies through many a skirt this season. I remember always wearing a slip with my dresses when I was younger. Always. It was also a huge deal to make sure it wasn’t showing. A fatal wardrobe flaw was to have a slip longer than your skirt. Yikes. Anytime I got a dress that had a liner built in I was in heaven.

This summer has pretty much been the year I turned Amish. I wear a skirt or a dress all the time. Maxi dresses are my absolute favorites. It makes me wonder why Little House on the Prairie clothing ever went out of style. It must have been a man that thought shorter skirts would be way better. Really, we women need to band together more and say No to short dresses. Try on a maxi dress. It hides the flaws on your legs….bruises, chub, stark white, etc. They are wonderful.

This summer the thought of putting on my much loved denim capris is painful (not the 105 degree weather has anything to do with that). I love my dresses this year. I have a skirt that I bought years and years ago but due to the fact it’s mostly white and has to be dry cleaned I didn’t wear it much. Also the fact it had a fancy enough top to require my heeled navy sandals that left me writhing in pain just looking at them didn’t help it’s cause any either. I was almost ready to give it away this year but then I had an epiphany. Why not switch out the fancy Navy sweater for a nicer navy t-shirt which would dress it down enough I could wear flat sandals. Genius. If only I thought about it 4 years and 6 varicose veins earlier. So one trip to Old Navy later I was set.

Until I wore it again for the first time. With Camryn. Then I remembered the other problem-Dry Clean Only. White skirt. So I decided to try washing it. Oh and I forgot to mention, this skirt had a built in liner. It was just a white cotton skirt. If I washed it on delicate and lined dried it how bad could it be?

As I watched the skirt dry it seemed to get shorter as the liner got longer. It was also pretty wrinkled. All it needed was a good ironing and it would straighten right out. I ironed it and the problem seemed to be solved. I packed it away for our trip. When we went out to eat with my mom and Steve on Friday night in Oklahoma City I wore the skirt. Something didn’t feel right. I thought it was because the bathroom was about 150 degrees and I couldn’t tell if my skin wasn’t drying after my shower or if I was profusely sweating again. I thought the liner was sticking because it felt twisted.

After we got home I decided to leave the skirt out and wear it again today. Normally I wash and sanitize all articles that have entered a hotel room, but since this skirt is so high maintenance I wanted one more wear. I got a glimpse of myself in the full length mirror and thought I saw the liner peeping out from the hem. It was my first day back after 7 days off….I was ready early for a change….all my other good clothes and/or corresponding non-showing underthings were still in the to be sanitized and de-bedbugged pile I decided to go with it. Here is where the lie came in. I asked Jay if he could see the skirt liner. He said just a little. I asked him if it looked ok or if I should change. He barely looked at me and said it was fine.  I know what he was thinking....I need to get out of here now and if she changes it will delay me another 10 minutes so I'm going to tell her you don't even notice it and then make a quick getaway....

Apparently it was not fine by the look I got from a lady around my grandmothers age at the post office today. She gawked at my liner. Clearly could not take her eyes off of it and then she gave me a little smirk. In her mind I was classified in the category of all that is wrong with today’s society….I was letting my slip show. First it is the slip, then an occasional bra strap next thing you know we are all letting whale tails show. Really!!! I always make sure my slip is not showing. Today (in the words of Jay’s Aunt Mary) was a bad fashion day.

Men (my husband) don’t understand what my fashion error said today. But how can we expect guys to understand women’s fashion when they go into any store and pick up 34x36 pants and they fit…no matter the store, the brand, the cut, the price. They fit. I let my grandmother down…but then again if it would’ve been my grandma getting stared at she would’ve adjusted her glasses with her middle finger and moved on. She’s been gone for 5 ½ years and I still miss her. Actually I just realized this is the skirt I wore to her funeral….

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