After all of the adoption posts this one will probably be out of place. If you are in the process of waiting for a child this probably isn't the post for you to read.
My kids are wearing me slick right now. Oh, I still love them like none other....but there are nights I am just counting the minutes until they go to bed. Last night I almost had an anxiety attack. I don't want to move. At all. And we have no intention of selling our house and moving....but sometimes I dream of a house with another living area in it.
Camryn was in our room watching Little Einsteins which was recorded which then means about every 25 minutes she is yelling for someone to start a new one. Cade was in the family room with Jay. Cade went duck hunting for the first time Saturday and he is now obsessed with it. It was all he talked about this weeked. Absolutely all. Mostly I heard.....duck.....gun.....duck....duck....duck....gun. It was crazy. Jay was trying to watch Madam Secretary and I wanted to do some Yoga. There was no where in my house to escape for a few minutes. I thought maybe I could do it in the kitchen but just as I was headed in there Cade went to get a drink. Then I went in our room and Camryn demanded something so I went back to the family room. I made Cade move from the loveseat to the couch so I could at least have one little area all to myself. Then I was positioned right in front of our Infared heater - you know the thing we bought during Propaneagedon. I just called it Hot Yoga and went with it. Then Camryn joined me which helped to melt my frustration because her Down Dog is pretty cute....and pretty darn good.
Last week, actually the same night as Obama's speech that wasn't aired on national television it got so bad in the house I decided to clean out the cat's litter box. That's what I've been reduced to. Sifting turds just because I know that is one moment they will leave me alone. I also decided I needed a Lime-A-Rita that same night so Jay gladly left to get me some. He needed a little alone time to. As I was cleaning cat poo and sweeping up the litter and leaves I heard Jay pull up outside. I cracked the garage door a little thinking 1. He would get out of the van so I could have my Lime-A-Rita 2. That we could hide out in the garage together for a few minutes and maybe utter a few sentences with no interruptions and 3. I needed to sweep out the leaves anyway. Instead Jay didn't get out. He found Obama's speech on the radio so he was listening to it. And he was screaming loudly at the radio. After a few minutes of me sweeping and Jay screaming I shut the garage door and went back into the house. We all have our ways of dealing with stress. Mine is cleaning up cat poop - Jay's is yelling at the radio over the President's speech. Whatever works I guess.
The funny thing was that same night as the speech I was exercising and my dad called. Cade answered the phone so I paused my video fully expecting Cade to hand me the phone. Instead he talked and talked and talked to my dad. When I finally got on the phone dad said he had asked Cade how he was doing. Cade replied with "I'm mad" then went on an immigration policy tirade with my dad. Anytime Cade starts to drive Jay crazy with this sort of thing I remind him that is his own Conservative doing. Jay is the one exposing him to talk radio and Fox news constatnly. You have to take the good with the bad.
I know that some day I will miss all of this activity. I will wish to be back in this time of my life. I really do try to embrace it because I did learn to not take any of it for granted during our adoption wait. But I am human. And sometimes I just need a quiet spot to do my Yoga. Maybe the garage....
Wednesday, November 26, 2014
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