Coping

I think as a family we are doing pretty well coping with what we lost. We all seem to have our own things that help us. Jay is keeping himself busy with work and another family project that he's taken on. I'm not really sure what I'm doing. I don't have one specific thing that I'm doing just a bunch of small stuff….put a puzzle together one night (Cade lasted all of 5 pieces), organized the closet in the other room (not sure what to call it yet since it's no longer the green room), been trying to decide on a new hobby (scrapbooking is too family oriented for me at the moment). Cade though has found plenty of things to do to keep himself occupied….he's been planning his birthday party.

I've always made a big deal about his parties. It all started because I had so much fun doing it. Then it progressed into not knowing if I'd ever have another child to do it for so I kept it up. Now Cade is starting to get into it. I'm sure someday his wife will not like it, especially if she has to plan "theme" parties, but for now I keep doing it because it's fun. It's really gotten entertaining this year because Cade is taking a very active role in planning his party. He comes by it naturally though because I can barely hold off past Christmas before I start asking what kind of party he wants for his next birthday. This year the big theme announcement came after our trip to California. We are having an Indiana Jones party. Surprise, surprise!!

This past week it's really taken a hilarious turn. He told me last weekend that he wanted to do something to resemble vines between our kitchen and dining room so people could walk through them. Of course I started mentally thinking out what I could do to make that happen. Then Memo and Papa Jim took him toy shopping last Friday. He eyeballed every toy in every toy store in Springfield looking for Indiana Jones stuff. Tuesday night Papa Kerry called and I had Cade answer the phone. The minute they started talking Cade started in on his birthday. He told Papa Kerry some of the stuff that he wanted for his birthday which included an Indiana Jones movie. Then I heard him tell Papa Kerry that he could be in charge of getting the movie for him, then Cade made a side note to himself…he whispered "I need to call Memo". I think he was going to tell Memo that the movie would be taken care of. When I got on the phone with dad he was laughing about being put in charge of the movie. Then last night Cade spent some time with Grandma Robyn and Pampa George. While he was there Charity called so she asked Cade what he wanted for his birthday. He put her in charge of getting him a whip that made sound effects. Charity asked him what to do if she couldn't find it. He told her it was online. She asked if she could give him money to buy it with and he told her she just needed to get online to find it. He put Grandma Robyn in charge of the Indiana Jones Lego sets.

While we were driving home last night I thought Cade was asleep so I told Jay about the vine idea. Apparently Cade wasn't asleep because he told me he had also been thinking about turning cotton balls into spider webs and putting them around the house. He said he told his idea to Neilson. We asked Cade what Neilson thought about it and Cade said "he said that was cool and then he asked me who I was going to invite". Then Cade told us "I need to start working on that".

To someone who doesn't know Cade if they were to read this they'd probably think we were horrible parents or something, but I think to the rest of us it's just him. He's also had a very hard couple of weeks so I think we are all indulging him a little bit. But then again Cade is a lot like me so he may already be working on his skills as a party planner. But to make him not sound so spoiled I did ask him what Jay and I were supposed to get him since he had assigned everything to everybody else. He was quiet for a minute and then he said you can just be the best parents ever to me. Either he knows how to work us or he is one very sweet and unique boy.