Legen(wait for it)dary

I have a whole post I'm working on about a night Jay and I had last week.  But since that is not done yet I wanted to make a quick note.  We had a customer, who is also a neighbor in the office today.  He made a comment about our pig venture.  Oh, these stories are getting around.  Jay and his Piggly Wiggly's are becoming legendary.  That is the second customer this week who asked about our pigs.  At least that helps the newer people that I work with to know that I'm not making this stuff up - we really are this crazy. 

And for another story.  Jay had some sort of idea that he'd be able to take one of the pigs to the Greenhand Initiation at school yesterday.  He came home and put one of them in a cooler, which is what we used to haul them around when they were smaller.  He also was driving a school van.  He got the pig loaded and pulled down the our lane to the road.  I guess the pig went absolutely nuts.  It jumped of the cooler and was running through the van.  Jay said it was squealing like he had never heard before.  If you've been to our house you know we don't sit that far back from the road.  Jay made it to the road and decided taking the pig was not a good idea....especially since the initiation was taking place in the HS cafeteria.  Can you imagine a crazy pig loose in a school?  The pig got put back with it's siblings. 

The pig stories just keep coming.....

Last night I had the kids by myself.  I had to do some shopping for two  funeral dinners so we went to Wal-Mart and ate out.  I’ve heard talking to your kids in the car is the best place.  I believe it.  I can usually get more information out of Cade then, than any other time.  Here was our conversation….

Cade:  The hernia pig was a little slow tonight but he was cold.  Since we only have 1 heat lamp now he wasn’t under it.

Me: What happened to the heat lamp?  Do we need to buy another one?

Cade: (panic on his face) you don’t know about the heat lamp? Dad didn’t tell you? (completely frustrated) Why doesn’t he tell you anything?  (completely resigned) Oh, I guess I know why he didn’t tell you….

All of that came from Cade’s mouth in a matter of seconds.  He went from panicked to frustrated to resigned in a short amount of time.  I was sitting there completely confused and had no idea what in the world was happening in the front seat of my van.

Me: (completely confused) What in the world are you talking about?

Cade:  The day we took the pig to the vet the pack-n-play flew out of the back of the truck and the heat lamp was in it.

I’m reeling from the fact the pack-n-play flew out of the truck and was imagining how bad that situation could’ve been if there had been another vehicle around.  I was trying to grasp that concept.

Me:  So what did dad say?  Was he concerned about it?

Cade:  Yeah, he said “I knew I shouldn’t have done that” 

I was thinking ok, Jay saw the error of his ways with the pack-n-play issue.  Cade is going to tell me Jay said he shouldn’t have done that….

Cade:  He said he knew he should’ve  put the heat lamp in the cab of the truck instead of in the pack-n-play

Me:  He was worried about the heat lamp?  Why didn’t you fold up the pack-n-play?

Cade:  The button is broken

So that explains why the fully assembled pack-n-play is still sitting in our front yard after Jay brought the pig home.  A friend from church stopped by  Wednesday night and asked if that was our babysitter when we are outside.  Nope…it’s just sitting in the yard.  When we got back last night I was going to try to bring it inside but it was dark and Charlie was howling and I was a little creeped out.  Again, yes we are the neighbors everyone would love to have.  At least tomorrow is Saturday.  Hopefully we will be able to get it in before the end of the weekend.  I asked Jay about it last night.  He still seemed to be more irritated by the loss of the $8 heat lamp.  I'm still focused on the pack-n-play issue.  We clearly weren't seeing eye-to-eye on what the problem was. 

 So to reacap if you're not following the story not only did the pigs almost burn down my house they could've caused a major problem on the highway because of a flying pack-n-play.  If I don't end up banning pigs at our house our insurance company will.   

And just so you don't think we sit around letting junk pile up in our yard...Jay got home late Tuesday night with the pig, after taking the kids to 4-H.  He took the kids to 4-H because I was working at the parsonage and Camryn caused me a heart attack by almost sticking a key in a wall outlet.    Jay just got everything unloaded, separated the pig and then it was 10 pm.  Thenext night the church friend came over at the same time we got home and then Jay was gone again last night to the area banquet.  Hobby Farming while Ag Teaching (at least if you are any kind of a good teacher)  means you just don't have a lot of extra time to deal with broken pack-n-play buttons.   And since Jay is a good teacher I know why the pack-n-play is still in the yard and I'm ok with it....mostly ok anyway.   

Christmas in February

Today was just like Christmas morning at our house.  Camryn, woke up in a great mood and came in our room carrying her Rudolph and Clarice.  These were her santa presents at Christmas and she was terrified of them.  So terrified that I have a video of her backing away from the tree right into my lap when she spotted them.  She wouldn't go near them that day or any day after that.  We moved them to her room and just let them sit.  I guess today was the day she decided she loved them.  What a funny little girl and how fitting she happened to be wearing Christmas jammies today.

Another Valentines Day

Well Valentines Day has come and gone and I still have yet to post Christmas 2013 pictures, or tell about my mom's surprise birthday party, or Lawson's 4th birthday or any of that other stuff.  Time just seems to get away from me anymore.  Actually it feels more like I move from one chaotic event to another.  I've actually for quite some time allowed myself to feel like somewhat of something....not quite a failure, but someone who can't seem to get their poop in a group.  The house is chaos.  The checkbook is chaos (2 people with debit cards means 1,000,000 transactions that need to be logged).  I forget to check backpacks.  I forget to refill my children's medications but it doesn't really matter because I will forget to give it to them even once I get it.  I serve way too many chicken nuggets for dinner or eat out because I'm so tired that I can't deal with frying hamburger and mixing it with Hamburger Helper.  The van looked like a typical mini-van on the inside for the longest time - the only thing keeping it from being completely disgusting was the lack of wood-paneled inserts on the door.  Even Cade has taken to telling me I look really tired because I have bags under my eyes. 

I've wondered what is wrong with me - why can I not seem to get it together and keep it together for longer than 5 minutes?  Then someone from church made the comment "adding that 2nd kid is rough."  Finally I felt somewhat vindicated and maybe not so much like a failure.  This was coming from seasoned parents who added their 2nd child only a couple of years after their 1st.  But they understood.  They talked about they could still do anything they wanted with #1, but when #2 came it was like someone put on the brakes.  And that is exactly how I feel.  I know this stage won't last forever.  Maybe my brain will come back and I will quit being so tired....of course then I will hit menopause and it will all start again.  Until then though I will no longer be working at the church parsonage with Camryn.  Someone stopped her from putting my keys in a wall outlet while I was staining the kitchen cabinets. I'm all done with that.  I tried to venture outside of my home bubble this week and that didn't work.  I will try again in another 6 months.

Part of last weeks chaos involved the dreaded Valentines Box.  I still remember typing the post with his first box and I said "1 down 6 more to go."  I knew that time would go fast, but I had no idea just how fast.  We just finished Cade's 7th box.  I might have been weepy if I wasn't so tired and busy trying to find a clean spot to take a picture of the box.  Thursday night I ran to Springfield to get treats and paint for my parsonage cabinet project and Jay stayed home and did a million other things.  Once I got home we finished the box.  And I'm proud to say Cade didn't touch one thing on it.  I learned in K a Valentines Box was not a fight I was willing to have with him.  We do plenty of things to make him responsible - gluing crap on a box is not something I see as life altering.  But I did laugh that night as I walked through our hall.  I could see Cade parked in front of the TV while also looking at Jay's back while he was hunched over our kitchen counter gluing legs on the box. 

This box ended up being a group effort for both me and Jay.  He did some, I did some, but he was the one responsible for the ear notch idea.  

And after these pictures Camryn ripped the pigs tail in two. 

Pig Update

Apparently the pigs are the only excitement around our house because that is all I've talked about for weeks.  And here is another update....

One of them is having hernia surgery right now.  Go ahead and laugh.  That's what everyone else does as soon as we tell them.  Just get it out of your system now.....

Ok, now that you are recovered I'd like to point out something.  We have 5 pigs - 2 black and white and 3 that are called Blue Butts.  Basically they are white with bluish gray spots on their butts.  This means that all three of the Blue Butts have had some sort of an issue because the other two saw the vet their first day alive.  One had the hurt shoulder and the other had its liver sticking out.  Also, this hernia pig is the only boy.  In the world of pigs you prefer boys for showing.  So what did we have? 4 girls and 1 boy.  Opposite of our cattle where you want girls and we always have boys.  Now we probably won't even be able to show the boy because the hernia is going to create a flap of skin on his belly.  I told Jay that when we were discussing getting married there was nothing ever brought up about nursing pigs back to health.  I see that he purposly left that out of the discussion. 

I did get a valentines card from Jay.  He bought it at the feed store.  It has a picture of a pig on it with a sign around it's neck that says I Love You.  The inside says "And I want to Hog you all to myself".  I thought it was pretty funny.  Then I noticed it was signed Jay, Cade, Camryn and The Litter.  I told Jay The Litter was a nice touch.  He had no idea that was on the card.  He signed his name and then gave it to Cade to sign his and Camryn's.  Cade took it upon himself to add the pigs.  Oh, I am living with a couple of jokesters.   

Clark, if that cat had nine lives he just used them all.....

I use a lot of references on this blog from Christmas Vacation.  Sorry - but humor me again.  Picture the scene where the cat chews on the Christmas tree lights.....now replace that scene with pigs instead of a cat.  Yup, that would be our life a week ago.

About 12:30 last Tuesday morning (the time of the last big snow) our smoke alarm started going off.  I jumped out of bed and headed to the hallway to check on the kids.  I knew immediately the smoke had something to do with the pigs in the garage.  Jay, who is a heavy sleeper, takes a little more time to get his bearings.  He made it into the hall and was trying to jump up and wave the smoke away from the detector.  I yelled at him to get to the garage.  About the time he hit the garage door Cade ran out of his room to hear Jay yell "Oh my gosh".  Cade screamed "the pigs."  I ran to the door and looked at Jay and Cade in the garage.  The smoke was so thick I couldn't see anything and I could see the electrical cords sparking and on fire.  For a few minutes I was sure the pigs were dead and we were going to loose the house.  I asked Jay if we needed to call the fire department.  He told me to wait a minute.  I didn't know what to do with myself.  I unlocked the front door in case I had to grab Camryn and make a getaway and I opened up some kitchen windows.  I also waved the smoke from the smoke detector and got that to quit going off. 

I checked on them again in the garage and Jay had the fire out.  It was a miracle, all the pigs were unhurt and the damage was just to their pen.  I was fully expecting to loose the garage.  Apparently they got a little wild and pulled down their heat lamp, which set the wood shavings on fire.  Jay figured it had probably been burning 10-15 minutes before the smoke alarm went off.  I'm still not sure how they survived all of the smoke that was in the garage.  They ended up back in the pack-n-play in our laundry room for the rest of the night.  Jay pulled out the burnt shavings and put the mangled smoking heat lamps in the dumpster and moved it several feet from the house.  I was up the rest of the night afraid something else would spark in the garage.  Jay spent his 1st snow day buying heat lamps, reconstructing their pen in the garage, and wiring up a more secure heat source for these pigs.

I've said for a while the lack of sleep the pigs caused at the beginning almost killed me.  Well, the pigs quitle literally almost killed us that night.  Thank goodness for a good smoke detector and the fact that being a mother has taught me to sleep like a cat.  Later that next night Cade asked if this was something we'd laugh about later?   Terry called us the Griswolds of the livestock world. 

But just to recap so you won't forget what these pigs have been though....
their mother stepped on two of them.  They were stitched up.  One fell off our kitchen counter the first night when we were doctoring it.  That is also the same one that got bandaged with an old burp rag and orange masking tape because I had no medical supplies.  Now they survived a fire.  There were flames in their wood chips by the time we found them.  You know in the last post when I said I thought we had about $1,000,000 invested in these pigs give or take?  Yeah, we quite seriously almost lost our house over the deal.  I know there must be a special place in heaven for wives who's husbands never give up....because using a ladder to hold up the heat lamps is 1,000x more safer than the broom and tricylce they were attached to.